❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥Someone Asked Why?❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥❥
Super women took a nose dive into the ground. She hit with such force she was buried for weeks. A heavy equipment operator was called in by God. He dug till he found her. She was still breathing but emotionally frail.
He took one look at her and he felt something he has never felt before. So when God said take care of her and love her......he did. He tried to walk away but couldn't....God filled him with an abundance of all the qualities he already possessed and said use these now to help her grow to her full potential as one day you will need what she has to give......
So he put her on a pedestal and kept her dusted and polished for years. Everyday he would polish and shine her and gave her everything he had inside as God instructed.
As the years slowly passed........and she shined like the brightest star in the sky......(He did an awesome job).....but now he was slowly losing himself.
She asked God with tears in her eyes " where is he going?" God said "he is going back to where he first came. It's a long hard journey and he needs you to help him get there safely."
I will give you an abundance of all you need to help him on his journey back to me, for that is where he came from.
So to those who ask why? Because I believe in fairy tales...He is my knight in shining armor...... He literally guarded me with his life.....
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Yesterday when we woke up the sun was shinning and the skies were blue....Tom said .."should we take a ride down to Granny's?"...... I replied with my usual "what ever you feel like doing!" He thought about it for awhile and said..."awww heck...let's go...we can see how far the river is out too....It's something to do"........
Yuppers...we made the trip to Granny's.... I'm thinking it's probably been a year as we usually will take at least a spring ride to see if the river is out and how high it is and how many idiots are out there fishing and freezing their hind ends off.....(There were quite a few : ( And they looked cold brrrr......
OH MY....Granny was surprised!!!!! Romeo took one look at Lilly and dove into his box in his cage and we never heard a peep out of him the whole time we were there......
The girls were on there best behavior......Lilly and Scooter played....Maggie kept Granny's feet warm...( Mag loves Granny)...... and after a bit the cards came out...
Tom said to Granny... "Bring it on.... heh heh.".... Now Tom's words, before we got there was.... "I'm going to kick Granny's butt in a game and than leave..... ha ha."
It was fun.... Tom was being a stinker as usual trying to get Granny all riled up and it appeared he was able too from time to time but even Tom is no match for Granny when she has her mind set.... She doesn't go down with out a fight..... Come to think of it.. " NOBODY has YET got the best of Granny" Those two are just too funny..
Than we headed home...Tom was getting antsy....AND of coarse...Tom was glad to be back home.... He said he enjoyed the ride and the visit but he belongs at home with his three girls : )
I always agree with him as it makes him feel better (normal) if he thinks I'm like him... so I said "me too" and he said.. "yeah ..because your like me and don't like to go anywhere either and be around people... hah? I said.. Yes, I'm just like you!" He answered.. "that's a good story" I said......" yes that is a good story" and than he let out a sigh of contentment........
And I said a short prayer thanking God for the lovely day, Tom's pleasant mood and most of all, the time with my MOM. I Love You MOM!
A funny story.....Tom and I have both put on a "little" (okay a lot) weight this winter : ( .....and of coarse we are trying to lose a few pounds... I'm not concerned as I know once we can get outside we will drop it back off....But Tom is obsessing about it...
Hence the "we're on a diet again"....... It took two weeks for Tom to take down his exercise apparatus that he so proudly invented and didn't use. Than I rearranged the furniture for summer and put the tread mill away...... which he used twice...
Well he is trying a little harder this time... He has stuck to his diet for five days now... diet consists of not eating junk food, pop, bread and butter and smaller amounts.... and the tread mill....... it's back out again.
Sooo the other day after he did an hour (3 miles) on the tread (second time since onset of diet )....... I "peeeeked" around the corner of the bed room where he was watching TV and I caught him laying on the bed doing some funny looking exercises....
I asked what he was doing..of coarse I was giggling at how funny he looked... he knew it and was laughing too and said "none of your business"
Well it seems he pulled some muscles in his lower back and is now walking funny and groaning a lot... I did ask if he was sure it was his back that hurt.. He said yes and than admitted to some of the contortions I DIDN"T see the other night... He felt it than.....
So this morning when we were having coffee in bed he turned on the news to check on the people who are flooding out in North Dakota... There was a pic ture of some young congressman on vacation sitting in a lounge chair in just shorts and a woman with big boobs standing behind him in a bikini and they had him on for a moment....... He is young and thin.... Key word thin..in shorts and tan....
Tom, through his pain, was trying to be funny and said something about how he looks like that..... I patted him on the back and said.. " I know sweetie...your such a HOTTIE " Oh My... I thought he was going to cause himself more injury as he tried to hold back the laughter... Guess it really hit his funny bone...What a beautiful sound..... his laugh can make the world laugh.... : ) Those that know it, knows what I'm talking about.....
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OH BABY!!!! Now there are two HOTTIES!
I thought I'd share a picture we both laugh at... We call it....... "Mid-Life Crisis"
......When we were young and foolish..... : ) I hope it makes you laugh or at least smile...
The weather has been ........ let's use the word "CRAP-Y" since I last posted.... I've been "expecting" things to take a down hill slide..... I shouldn't use the word expect as with Alzheimer's...you just stay "on guard"..... but weather has always brought the UGLY-S out in the past so I've been Waiting?....... Expecting?....... On Guard?........ At the same time PRAYING........I haven't been well for awhile now.... I know..... "You have to take care of yourself so you can take care of him...... easier said than done. Basically I have a chronic sinus infection and all the woes that go with it; which I have had since August 2008..... I think I'll use the word SUCK-Y to describe how it's been.. I've seen Dr.s 7 times during this period.... I'll be having a CT scan now followed by an ENT Dr. We'll see how that goes?BAD WEATHER, OBSESSIONS, ME SICK......... all trigger bad behavior on Tom's part.... It didn't this time...INSTEAD so far (he's asleep right now) he has been talking about how blessed and grateful he is for GOD, friends, family and me....... This is more like the "Ol' Tom" : )He has been reminiscing about all the things we have done together, the memories we have created are never ending.... and when he forgets, I tell him the stories and he loves to listen to them.... because even if he doesn't remember the details the stories bring back the FEELINGS he had at the time..... He's been even waking me during the night to tell me how much he loves me and that he's laying there thinking about us and the life we have shared........When Tom woke at 7AM he said he had finally fell asleep around 4:30 Am..... And that he will be going back to sleep after he's had a cup of coffee in bed. While we were having our coffee he said it was a long night.... He thought about us..... and how blessed he was... and that he was aware that he has been having good days lately and was happy about that and thanked God..... He said he doesn't like it either when he has bad days as he is aware but can not control it..... I said yah "I don't like it either and neither do the girls"... He said "I know... I'm sorry. I thank God everyday for you and sometimes all night long"........... I said " is that when I feel you groping my face?" He laughed and said " I have to make sure you are there!" We both laughed and I said "it's okay... I think it's kinda funny"***********************************************************************
Added Later today........
Definition of good day ..... These days that mostly just refers to his mood and how he is handling everyday life.... Today was the BEST as we laughed about nothing till we had tears in our eyes and couldn't breath..... we use to do that a lot..... as far as his other losses... Good day today means he isn't aware of all his losses....bad day is when he catches himself and realizes..... That makes him sad.I wished it was just a memory disease... It would be so much easier to deal with and accept....... ❤ I Miss You Tom ❤
Nope...He's not dead...He is basking in the sun........Enjoying his fire.
Yesterday he decide to start cleaning up the trees that fell during the winter storms.... He decided that when he found out I was CLEANING house.... ha ha ha... That worked for me because he had the girls with him too and I could see them from the window.He really enjoyed the day out there with the girls...... He said while he was out there he would look at the house and think about "MOM cleaning the house while DAD was out cutting wood"..... (It made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside)
Since the mental release of beaver trapping, due to acceptable circumstances, to a dedicated trapper........My dear sweet little boy has returned....
We had Tom's Sister and Husband out for fish yesterday...... Jason gave us a bag the other day when we stopped by... Tom likes to share it when we have it as it's such a treat to be shared if there is enough......
Tom really enjoys their visits...... I heard him on the phone saying this...."because they like our girls (dogs) and spoil them as we do..... so he doesn't have to worry about making them behave and they make themselves to home so you don't have to worry if they have everything they want... like a cup of coffee or whatever...
And what I noticed is they make Tom feel good about himself... That he is just fine being who he is..... and the way he is... that he is just as good as anyone else and he doesn't have to make up any stories about anything to impress them........
So he is really relaxed with there visits and just plain enjoys their company.......I have to say I enjoy their visits too because it's relaxing human contact for me too!.....
During the winter months I arrange the furniture to make the house feel snuggle-ly, cozy and warm...Tom responds well to it......In the summer I move things around to make the house feel open and airy... Tom responds well to this too.So time to move the furniture....as we all four have spring fever......Cozy now feels cluttered to Tom........I know this because he's trying to throw everything we have away to un-clutter. (clutter is a feeling) So when he laid down for his afternoon nap I totally changed the house around. Maggie naps with Tom but I could see her watching as I was sliding the couches and other furniture past the door quietly... Bet she was thinking..."Oh I sure hope Dad don't wake up and see what MOM is doing..." : 0Lilly was quietly peaking around the corners unsure of "WHAT'S GOING ON!" When Tom awoke he did his usual..."MOM!!"...."WHAAT?".... WHAT YA DOIN' ?" "NOTHING!"....... He was just making sure I was here......When he got up and seen the house transformed.... his eyes lit up like a child at xmas... WOW this looks great.... How did you move the furniture? I smiled and said.. "You know I can do anything!"So he is now less anxious in the house and I have less fear of him throwing things away....."inside"......Now he's outside looking for things to throw away or burn up!......He's like the toddler that throws EVERYTHING in the trash.......Last spring he tried to throw my baking pans away.... But now I know what's going on with him and so far have been able to stay a half a step ahead of him.... : )
Sunday Tom decided to change the oil in the car. It's the one thing he has not had a problem doing yet. This time it wasn't that way.. I've seen such an obvious decline that I wasn't surprised but still saddened. WE did get the job done so we won't worry about it again till fall.It seems the beaver prices fell so drastically that Tom has decided NOT to do any "more" ; ) trapping this year. We'll just gear up for next fall. Thank You God!Sunday afternoon being so nice out we took a drive over to the Hauners. We visited outside as Tom didn't want to be inside on such a nice day.... It was wet but the dogs played with the girls and everybody was soaked by the time we left.On the way home Tom decided we needed to drive down this logging road to see if there are any beaver dams back there. He took the wheel and I have to say before Alz. stripped Tom of his judgment...he would not have drove a car down this road.It was quite a ways back and pretty greasy. I did what I always do when put in a situation out of my control...Prayed and gave it to God, than sat back and enjoyed the crazy ride.On the way back out, because I wasn't showing any emotion, as in fear, he said "are you scared?" I said "No" He said "it's hard underneath...it's just greasy on top." I smiled and said.."I know" We made it out just fine...And I was back in the drivers seat.... Coming down our long drive way the top was greasy... Now he doesn't always catch an obvious joke ....And he's really funny about his driveway....I can't count the hours he spends grooming his drive way...It's his pride and joy and always tells me how to drive on it.... That all being said...I said, " don't worry... it's hard underneath....it's just greasy on top" Ha ha ha I'm too funny.... He started to say.........."I know" but than it clicked and he laughed.....I said gotch-ya! He thought that was funny!Another funny story......Tom uses wrong words all the time but I know what he is talking about so I don't correct him or bring it to his attention. Well the other day I had a pair of his smaller (okay older) carhart pants on as they shed the water a bit better than jeans. But now I was soaking wet....He had his NEW ones on.....He said "we'll have to get you a new pair of carhart jeans" I said "why?" He said "because they'll soak up the water better than those do.....I said "Looks like these soak up the water just fine!".....Took him a second but than he laughed and said "you know what I mean...I don't know the right word"... I said "repel?" He said "yah.. that's it" and we both laughed some more......
Wah-Hoo!! 40 below to 40 above........ I'll take the above after the later and 18 - 20 inches of snow.....
The 4-wheeler said NO WAY when it came to the drifts going to the sheds so I started up my snow shovel and we shoveled some paths yesterday.... At least the shovel will start in any weather or temp. and maintenance cost is low. Cheap to run too as it burns calories instead of gas... but I have to admit it only runs as long as this "old bag" does. : )
I always have my girls prodding me along.. "Come on mom, you can do it!! " They try out the paths to see if they are wide enough and if they think I'm slacking they will knock a bunch of snow back where I've shoveled.. I told them if they keep it up I'll get them some doggie shovels and they can clear the paths... '
They know when they have pushed their luck as I start hollering at them. So they knock me in th
e snow and pounce on me... It's amazing I don't come in looking 
like a snowman pretzel?
But they don't let me take things too serious and we find fun in most things we do... They keep me going and are amazing in helping me with Tom.
Tom comes out every few minutes to see if I'm okay.... Than he says "that's good enough get in the house"... I say, "In a minute. I just have this little bit left." A few minutes later he's back.... But that's okay because than I know he's not getting into trouble in the house by himself because he's too busy worrying about what I'm doing outside. : )
He is becoming a little more challenging these days as he drifts off into his own little world... Because he is young and physically fit and he is losing sight of his mental deficits, as in not aware........ and his reasoner is broke so we don't want to try to reason as that brings on anger that can instantly turn to rage..... and with his control button broke too ..... OH BOY! Ya just don't want to go there.
Someone recently said to me...."But it's just a memory thing, isn't it?
It doesn't help when all these well meaning people who seem to all have "Medical Degrees" of some kind? They talk to him and see nothing wrong with him so they encourage him to do things that are not possible for him / US to do. WHICH in turn creates the scenario above.....
I would like to CHALLENGE any of the above well meaning people to take Tom for a week end...... : ) I could use the break!
PS......For the most part....When people are working WITH me... He's just a cute, fun loving giant 7 year old and I'm Mom to him and the girls (dog)... That's okay with me because every one is happy.
Did I say I like snow? Well, I still do but......... I decided I don't like Tom when it snows....Can I say obsessive, o-r-n-e-r-y, grizzly and bear....All in the same sentence.
He plowed 4 times yesterday with 9 p m being the last time....He called everybody he could think of with a plow on there truck.... Finally the guy that is logging down here said he'd run in after they get the logging road opened up....
We got 18-20 inches of snow and than drifting.....Yes it was a good thing he did all that plowing as our 4-wheeler couldn't push that much snow at one time...
BUT on the other hand as I HAVE pointed out....We have to go no where...I find it FUN to be snowed in for a day... We could always get some one to plow us out.... It's not life or death as Tom seems to think and he use to love the ADVENTURE! Now he FREAKS OUT!
On the other hand....He also has been calling everyone he remembers from the past to see if beaver ponds exist behind their places or their hunting shacks and if he can trap them...... The snow has halted this for now..........WHEW!
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Actually Tom before Alzheimer's...loved adventure... Being snowed in would have been a fun adventure.... Like when we went up into Canada on the moose hunting trips... All by ourselves... no way out....6-8 weeks and would cry when we had to leave. We'd laugh at the thought of getting stranded up there. Now Tom get's freaked out over not getting out of our driveway for a day even though we are not going any where.....Breaks My Heart!
Funny faces....in the mirror.... at the dogs.... at the tv... when on the phone and than there are those behind my back? I asked him why he makes funny faces and he said sheepishly..... "I dah- know... I asked "do you think it's funny?" and he said smirking "ah-hah" Beaver trapping has been heavy on his mind.... He hasn't set a trap all winter.... but when I listen to him talking on the phone... they been adding up (the beaver ) and when someone calls... he just came in from checking his traps and I guess I'm quite the old skinning lady.... "I LOVE IT" so he says..... We went riding around Saturday looking for beaver dams.... He got a little turned around, lost, confused? He admitted to it later in the evening. I think it scared him.....only a little.He called around asking different guys if they seen any beaver dams..... he called this guy who has a plane... asked if he could go up with him sometime.... looking for beaver dams...He needs more traps... bigger ones I guess..... Most of what we bought a few years ago, and dyed and tagged and weathered......haven't ever been set....But they are only good for certain situations I guess......and he would have bought bigger ones at the time we bought these others but the cost held him back... aaa-huh?He called and asked Travis if he could put a hitch on the car. Than I can drop him off with the 4-wheeler and pick him up later.....I was talking to Travis and he said his boss had a chip put in his dog so the dog can be tracked.... Maybe?
Well now...Hows the diet?.....We took a few days off and today we are back on the wagon. MAYBE???? Okay.........Maybe Not.........I will be glad when the bucket thing-y comes down though as I have come close to hanging myself on it, stubbed my toes on it and tripped over it. Can we say...health hazard?
❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧I would like to introduce you to "Marlin"......The newest member of our family
. Sanj and the boys brought him out for Grampa..... Tom loves to watch the fish when he's sitting at the table.
We had one before and he was sad when he went belly up.... so than we had some minnows till they jumped out of the bowl..... So we are very excited about Marlin.... the girls aren't impressed... They think he's rather boring.. Kids! : ) So I gave them a ball and said "go play with that."Yesterday Tom was having a rather good day and it was beautiful out...... So we all ventured to town in the morning as he had a gift certificate for Border Bargains from Ruby June and Ronnie (Tom's sister and husband) for his birthday. He bought a sweat shirt and he was still doing really good so I took him to Hardees before heading home.In line there was a Mom and a little boy about 3-4 years old. He was a bit of a stinker. So when he turned away from Tom, Tom put his face right in front of the kid.. When the boy turned around again Tom said boo.....I mean they were touching noses.
It scared the little boy and he hauled off and hit Tom.. The Mom told the boy to behave...the man was just teasing.... She didn't look impressed with Tom.. and the little boy was pissed.
I thought it was kinda funny. Maybe not appropriate behavior, on Toms part that is, but I live in his reality.. Remember... but I did wait to laugh till after we were out of their sight : ) hee hee When we got home, the four of us went for a 4-wheeler ride down a logging road. The girls ran and played... Maggie likes to slide on her back upside down... down the slope of a snow bank. She is such a pup at heart.......They both have really enjoyed winter and will be sad to see it go. They are both hot blooded and don't do well with summer heat.
ile......
wondering if I should call the Daily Journal (Home Town Paper) This story must be Really amazing....
