We have been experiencing some turbulence in our neck of the woods. It went from nasty weather to the water pump going out in the van with no means to get it fixed, to Gram going into the hospital with chest pain ending up in Duluth by ambulance to find they needed to extract her gall bladder to a mystery infection attacking her body and a mysterious painful, red, swelling of her feet that looked mean and nasty.
This all had a bad effect on Tom which is par for the coarse when some one has dementia. He wasn't feeling all that safe, secure, warm and fuzzy with all the stressful vibes floating in the air. The reaction to all this is acting out in a not so nice verbal, temper tantrum throwing, pouting, bad boy way.
Me....? I so see the scared but naughty "boy" lashing out the only way he knows how to express his fears... a feeling he doesn't understand.
So I do what you would if it was your child... love him, ignore what you can and reassure him everything is going to be alright.
But until life gets back to "our" norm he will be like a bouncing ball. Lucky for me I have always ducked when a ball was coming my direction so I have that natural instinct and with my cat like reflexes I do well lol
I'll be back when things settle down some but I thought I would update as to where we have been.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
BUSTED!!!
Right now I'm a bit UPSET with Tommy Boy! He always has trapping on his mind....
when the weather is warm I should say.... cold and rain will keep him inside.
He can't set a beaver trap BUT he CAN trap Martin & Fisher.... which the season will soon be upon us.
Every year he wants to set a trap behind our house... every year I tell him no... the girls!
Every year he says they will have to stay in the yard. Every year I tell him NOT POSSIBLE!!!
Every year he has to set bait out and see if there is any activity... Every year the girls get in it...
I tell him to clean up the site and go test or trap somewhere else. AND he usually does.....
or NOT if the weather turns crappy by the time the season opens.
Well yesterday this all took place as a seasonal thing...... BUT the results were a little different.
This morning I let the girls out as usual.... I lay on the couch in front of the window as I fully wake up..... The window was open by my face and I was enjoying the fresh fall air that came through......
THAN it changed... the smell in the air!!! S K U N K!!!!!! I flew off the couch adrenalin pumping and wide awake now! I yelled for the girls. SARAH, LILLY, EMILY!!!!!!! They all slowly, sheepishly, guilty.... slink-ed toward the house...... Heads down, tails down and ears back..... single file...... "BUSTED"
************************************************
when the weather is warm I should say.... cold and rain will keep him inside.
He can't set a beaver trap BUT he CAN trap Martin & Fisher.... which the season will soon be upon us.
Every year he wants to set a trap behind our house... every year I tell him no... the girls!
Every year he says they will have to stay in the yard. Every year I tell him NOT POSSIBLE!!!
Every year he has to set bait out and see if there is any activity... Every year the girls get in it...
I tell him to clean up the site and go test or trap somewhere else. AND he usually does.....
or NOT if the weather turns crappy by the time the season opens.
Well yesterday this all took place as a seasonal thing...... BUT the results were a little different.
This morning I let the girls out as usual.... I lay on the couch in front of the window as I fully wake up..... The window was open by my face and I was enjoying the fresh fall air that came through......
THAN it changed... the smell in the air!!! S K U N K!!!!!! I flew off the couch adrenalin pumping and wide awake now! I yelled for the girls. SARAH, LILLY, EMILY!!!!!!! They all slowly, sheepishly, guilty.... slink-ed toward the house...... Heads down, tails down and ears back..... single file...... "BUSTED"
************************************************
Tom's stress test came out fine... no sign of every having a heart attack, blood flow was normal .... no blockage or anything......
We cancelled the sleep apnea test as Tom has been loosing weight and so he has been breathing better at night.
Tom went on a diet after his hospital stay... He said he had to take off all the weight he gained that the pills put on him.... So he quit eating a bag of chips a day, bread with a pound of butter per slice, helpings of food that would feed two people well, candy bars and chocolate assortments of all kinds,...........
In one month he has lost 15 lbs (he says 30 -50... depends on who he told)..... now exercise is NOT required for this diet. Tom calls it a starvation diet....... NO BODY else could ever do what he is doing... it is brutal!!!!!!
Tom seems so happy inside that he radiates happiness as he has declared himself fit as a fiddle and cured of his dementia.....
He speaks of all the energy he has now... as he sits on the phone or staring out the window talking about all he is going to do that day or already did from his chair at the kitchen table.......?
The weather has been more than great this past month... 70's - 80........ ONE out of four days he might leave the house to go bird hunting on his 4 wheeler....... as he tells every one he goes every day all day long...... AND oh my goodness the birds he has gotten.....
BUT he is happy inside and that's all that counts... he knows his stories are stories but it makes him and convinces himself... he IS OK....
Unfortunately he didn't get back what the disease already claimed and one of them being his filter for inappropriate language..... He over reacts to what he perceives was said and reacts with the foulest mouth I have ever heard in my entire 57 years on this earth....... with pure HATE in his voice... (if the devil had a voice... ummmm ☞ "TOM" )
AND he shares his miss - guided opinions with all who will listen and attack anyone he believes has wronged him in any way......
BUT he is happy and is cured so it's OK... he has always been like that?????
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Beautiful Weather - Fun Days
God has blessed us with some wonder fall weather and color..... I convinced Tom to take me on the trails bird hunting... Gosh... it was like the "good old days"..... I even jumped off and chased down a run away bird through the woods.... It brought back to him the warm fuzzy feelings he had for me so many years ago......
I wasn't MOM the caregiver but the vibrant fun loving silly girl he met so many years ago........ Gosh... we went for miles on these trails.... this is the first year in a while that it has been dry enough to travel this far.....
We came upon some unknown trails.... when we seen "private property signs" we would turn around.... well as we were exploring new trails there suddenly appeared a "ghost" like figure of a woman on the trail.... Scared the begeezes out of both of us....
She was dressed all in black silk like clothing.... slipper like shoes...snow white hair pulled back.... very white skin and red lipstick........ she was just standing there.
We stopped and were relieved to see it was a real person.... we apparently wandered onto private property..... she said she was out walking her trails but the woman was out of breath..... ? We apologized and moved on......
Took us a while to recover from that... Oh what an eerie feeling.......!!!
Tom has been losing some much needed weight. His method is madness..... He barely eats.... He put it on by over - eating and now losing it by not - eating. NOT HEALTHY I know but there is no reasoning with him.
Yesterday we finally cut up and removed the trees that fell in the yard a long while ago....... Everyday was the day..... so I wasn't sure if it was going to happen that day or if TOMORROW would be a better day.
Tom got up around 9 AM as he has been doing for a month now..... He sat at his spot at the table ... drinking coffee, smoking cigarettes, takes his pills..... makes phone calls to see what everybody is doing.......stares out the window..... nodding off ......TODAY IS THE DAY!!! he says.
I'm ready... dressed, cleaned up the house, picked up sticks in the yard... kept coming in to see if Tom would soon be out.... NOPE!!! still sitting there........
I went out and started working on the insulation in the garage.... soon he calls me in for a cup of coffee....... he is slowly putting on cloths... he has a tee shirt on now and socks.
It's around noon now.... I'm trying not to get pissy but I can't stand wasting all this time..... Tom is still declaring he is going to cut up those trees.
"I don't know how I should do it" he says. "Chunk them up and I'll stack it for outside fires or cut longer lengths and I'll pull then into the woods with the 4-wheeler" is what I suggested.
It was just days before he was telling me he was going to have a big old fire and burn them all up.....For #1... there are burning restrictions on..... and #2... he has told me over and over since we have lived here and even recently.... "they won't burn"
For heavens sake...HE IS A LOGGER... CUT THE DAMM TREES UP AND I WILL DEAL WITH THE REST!!!!! Ummmmm I said that under my breath.
OH MY... it was after 12 noon and he finally put his jeans on and I helped him with his boots. We were going to do it!!!!! My heart is pounding.. it's going to happen....
I go outside and wait for him... and wait.. and wait....
FINALLY he came out..... we headed over to the trees... he is just kinda looking the situation over? "Tom... cut off a chunk and I'll drag it in the woods." He did and I did..... It wasn't long and we had all the trees gone from the yard.....
We went in and "had coffee" ...... I convinced him to cut up a cedar that had fallen over one of my trails in the woods....... I could see he about had it with the activity all in one day BUT I PUSHED IT...... "ahhh one more little tree honey?" Well that was way over the top ..... as he cut this little poplar for me he started sucking all the fun out of our day. "Now my new chain is dull..... blah blah blah blah..... He went to the house and I went to the garage......
Soon I hear... I made fresh coffee..... I went in just to make sure he had survived all that activity.... He was back in his chair at the kitchen table and that is where he stayed planted for the remainder of the day...... smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee and calling people to see what they are doing.......
I wasn't MOM the caregiver but the vibrant fun loving silly girl he met so many years ago........ Gosh... we went for miles on these trails.... this is the first year in a while that it has been dry enough to travel this far.....
We came upon some unknown trails.... when we seen "private property signs" we would turn around.... well as we were exploring new trails there suddenly appeared a "ghost" like figure of a woman on the trail.... Scared the begeezes out of both of us....
She was dressed all in black silk like clothing.... slipper like shoes...snow white hair pulled back.... very white skin and red lipstick........ she was just standing there.
We stopped and were relieved to see it was a real person.... we apparently wandered onto private property..... she said she was out walking her trails but the woman was out of breath..... ? We apologized and moved on......
Took us a while to recover from that... Oh what an eerie feeling.......!!!
Tom has been losing some much needed weight. His method is madness..... He barely eats.... He put it on by over - eating and now losing it by not - eating. NOT HEALTHY I know but there is no reasoning with him.
Yesterday we finally cut up and removed the trees that fell in the yard a long while ago....... Everyday was the day..... so I wasn't sure if it was going to happen that day or if TOMORROW would be a better day.
Tom got up around 9 AM as he has been doing for a month now..... He sat at his spot at the table ... drinking coffee, smoking cigarettes, takes his pills..... makes phone calls to see what everybody is doing.......stares out the window..... nodding off ......TODAY IS THE DAY!!! he says.
I'm ready... dressed, cleaned up the house, picked up sticks in the yard... kept coming in to see if Tom would soon be out.... NOPE!!! still sitting there........
I went out and started working on the insulation in the garage.... soon he calls me in for a cup of coffee....... he is slowly putting on cloths... he has a tee shirt on now and socks.
It's around noon now.... I'm trying not to get pissy but I can't stand wasting all this time..... Tom is still declaring he is going to cut up those trees.
"I don't know how I should do it" he says. "Chunk them up and I'll stack it for outside fires or cut longer lengths and I'll pull then into the woods with the 4-wheeler" is what I suggested.
It was just days before he was telling me he was going to have a big old fire and burn them all up.....For #1... there are burning restrictions on..... and #2... he has told me over and over since we have lived here and even recently.... "they won't burn"
For heavens sake...HE IS A LOGGER... CUT THE DAMM TREES UP AND I WILL DEAL WITH THE REST!!!!! Ummmmm I said that under my breath.
OH MY... it was after 12 noon and he finally put his jeans on and I helped him with his boots. We were going to do it!!!!! My heart is pounding.. it's going to happen....
I go outside and wait for him... and wait.. and wait....
FINALLY he came out..... we headed over to the trees... he is just kinda looking the situation over? "Tom... cut off a chunk and I'll drag it in the woods." He did and I did..... It wasn't long and we had all the trees gone from the yard.....
We went in and "had coffee" ...... I convinced him to cut up a cedar that had fallen over one of my trails in the woods....... I could see he about had it with the activity all in one day BUT I PUSHED IT...... "ahhh one more little tree honey?" Well that was way over the top ..... as he cut this little poplar for me he started sucking all the fun out of our day. "Now my new chain is dull..... blah blah blah blah..... He went to the house and I went to the garage......
Soon I hear... I made fresh coffee..... I went in just to make sure he had survived all that activity.... He was back in his chair at the kitchen table and that is where he stayed planted for the remainder of the day...... smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee and calling people to see what they are doing.......
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